So, I wait

So, I wait...for so many things.  I wait for forms to be returned that we sent off 3 months ago.  I wait for the reference letters to be written from family and doctors.  I wait for the home study to be finalized so we can submit it.  I wait for the next step in what seems to be a forever process.  I wait for my child.  I have no control over the timeline, even though I have a great one all mapped out in my head!  It seems that my routine is I hurry up and complete a form and then wait.  Rinse and repeat...  If God would just show me His timeline, things would be so much better!  Or would they?  If I knew when this all would happen, would I seek Him?  Would I cry out to Him?  Would I depend on Him?  Would I try to change His mind and beg Him to speed it up?  Would I grumble and complain?  Oh wait, that's exactly what I'm doing right now!  Although I have no control over the timing of how this story plays out, I do have control over how I respond to the wait.  I can grumble my time away or I can trust that His timing is perfect!  I say it over and over, but am I just talking the talk?  I know that God is having us wait for a reason...more like lots of reasons.  This is the time to strengthen my relationship with my husband, daughter and son.  It's a time to pour into those relationships so that we can pour out on our new son/daughter.  It's time to ask God to prepare our hearts for this new child and them for us.  It's a time to grow in His word, as I'm sure we will need it with the upcoming struggles we will face.  It's a time to be quiet and listen to His voice, so I will know it distinctly from all the other voices in my head (yes, I'm a bit crazy!).  It's a time to focus on someone/something other than ourselves and our situation.  It's a time to ask God to show me a new way to pray.  So, I wait...

LORD, help me learn your ways.
   Show me how you want me to live.
⁵ Guide me and teach me your truths.
   You are my God, my Savior.
   You are the one I have been waiting for.